Miracle

I came back to college on the 6th of December 2017. The previous month had been one of the lowest phases of my life. I faced questions and dilemmas everyday without getting any answers. For the first time in my life I was uncertain about something. Uncertain about my own self , my career , my college and everything that revolved around it. The biggest question I faced was that of returning to Bangalore. I was tired, I didn’t want to come back. I was finding excuses , reasons and what not , to just stay home. College reopened on the 2nd of December, my sister’s engagement was on the 28th of November , so I extended my college break until then. And subsequently I asked my father for some more time. till the 5th of December I did not get any answer. Whether I want to go back or not or take a break year. 5th December I received a call from college and they asked me to join back as soon as possible. I took the next flight to Bangalore. I hugged my grandmother really tightly before leaving and cried a lot. With a heavy heart I left for Bangalore , while facing extreme anxiety and nervousness , I cried in the flight and after landing I called my mother , told her about my condition during the flight and kept talking to her till I reached my accommodation. It was tough to face everything else again , the people I ran from and the place I had seemed to hate. The next day I got ready for college and with a lot of fear walked towards the college gate. I met my teachers , entered the class and felt slightly better. I realised people were concerned about me here and also had immense love for me. As I was sitting , here came a fair , chubby and dynamic lady , who shouted after looking at me and hugged me tight. At that moment I was so lost , that I didn’t realise what exactly happened. But I won’t deny that the hug was all that I needed at that point in time. It gave me strength , courage and made me feel like everything will get fine soon. My father had given me time till the 1st of February , 2018 , to decide whether I wish to get back to Delhi or continue staying in Bangalore. 

Days passed and this woman helped me complete all my submissions as I had to do 6 of them in 3 days. She offered help herself and asked me to sit with her as she saw me low and upset. She made me happy , her presence gave me a feeling of home. One day , we were sitting together in the auditorium as a matter of coincidence and I started venting out all that I had in my heart and mind. It was a very strangest thing for me to do as I don’t share my problems even with the closest people in my life. I am very secretive when it comes to my troubles and struggles but while sitting next to her I just felt I could say anything without having the fear of being judged. I went on and and on and she being the kind soul she is did not even stop me once and kept nodding her it. Subsequently  she told me that she has been facing the same emotions being away from home but as she had no option , this is where she had to be. So she was struggling too , but she accepted the situation and was fighting it out. She told me everything will be fine by the 1st of February and ‘Inshallah’ I’ll decide the best for myself. 

We sat together , spent time together and everything seemed to be getting fine. I was finally laughing and smiling without hesitation. The burden on my shoulder seemed light. We had our college break from the 23rd and I was supposed to fly for Goa and she was supposed to go to Saudi Arabia for the holiday. For me to miss people in my life is not an everyday thing, but for the first time rather than missing Delhi and my home , I was missing her because she made me confident and gave me the courage to fight the situation I was in. She gave me the faith that my mother would give me if she was by my side then. She felt like home away from home , the same comfort , courage , confidence that I felt in the arms of my mother , her mere presence gave me all these feelings In abundance. For the people who knew me , for them to believe that I am writing this must be tough. But yes , that was it. Miracles happen and she seemed no less than any. She gave me all reasons to stay in Bangalore. She made me happy. Made me re-realise the pain my parents have gone through to see me succeed and how passionate I have been about this dream of mine since class 6th and I just , I just can’t let go all of it so easily. 

28th of January , I was still there. Still confused. Not 100% convinced whether I wish to stay in Bangalore or get back home. My father reminded me of 1st February everyday. On the 28th of January , we were walking on a cross over bridge and she asked me whether I decided something or no. Of course amongst so many people she was the only one who knew what I was going through exactly. I told her that I am still confused , have no positive or negative  vibe and don’t know what to do and tell my father. The next thing that happened and the line told to me by her has come about to change my life drastically , she said – “Shubham I don’t know you well enough and I am not sure whether you give me the position to say this , but I am getting  a vibe that you should stay here. If Allah has sent you here he has a reason, and you must find and later respect that reason, you’ll do extremely well here , rest , upto you. Make the best choice”. Yes , Miracles happen. 

She went inside the restaurant and told her I’ll come inside after a while. I called my father that very moment and told him that I am not coming back to Delhi. I shall stay in Bangalore. Yes , miracles do happen.

From that day I found a beautiful friend , a beautiful person, a beautiful soul who became a part of my life and made everything fine. We spent most of our time together , the thing which we connected most on was food. Nearly every meal was outside , everyday together.

Haagen Dazs , Starbucks , Kawa kharpo , Asia Kitchen , Sanju , #MGRC , #RROO (you know why) , Keema fries and so many things will always be one of the fondest memories of my life , and I hope we continue to make more memories , live more moments together and seize everyday.

One of the fondest memories of our journey will always be the final of basketball match. I was nervous for the first time as I had returned to the basketball court after 6 months and reaching to the finals was a big thing. I was nervous, had anxiety. She didnt stay back for any match due to some personal reasons but for the final she did. It’s a moment I can never forget. Just before the match began I looked around and my eyes went on her to possibly get thumbs up before the match began. But what I saw was possibly the best sight I have ever seen. Her eyes were closed and she was making a dua. Until then I didn’t know for what it was for , but in blinked my eye thrice to capture the moment. After the match I asked her whether it was for me or no and she said I was as nervous as you were because I knew how important this match was for you. That’s when I knew I won at friendship, and I have one of the best friends one can ask for.

She’s been there for me no matter what. Stood by me and above all has made me a better version of myself. Today, I am a calmer, wiser and a more composed person because of her. She has taught me the value of a lot of things and she continues to push me for the better so that I can become the best version of myself.

She is carefree with me , she shares most things with me only , she says she is the most comfortable in sharing everything and anything under the sun with me and that my presence makes her feel complete and happy. And today I promise you Sarah Ayreen Mir (she has a lovely name and I love calling her by her full name ) that I will always value and respect the immense amount of comfort you have with me and the faith you show in me. I will stand by you, and always know that no matter where you go , your stupid boy will always wish the best for you , stand by your side , trouble you , make you laugh at the oddest times and will try and bring out the best version of you so that you achieve all heights because you are destined for the best.

I wish you all the happiness, success and the best of everything. May you always get what you desire and chase all your dreams and go places. Always know that I might pray for myself and other people in my life In general, but if there’s one person for whose happiness and well-being I will pray for everyday , no matter where I am , what I am doing , for you are one of the most beautiful persons I have ever come across, the best of all , today , tomorrow , always.

Keeping all cake cutting, gifts and surprises for you aside , I am gifting you one of the most special things I could , my writing. Writing is like a dream for me and you know it better than anyone else. I always wanted to start a blog and today on your birthday, I gift myself this blog and you , my first blog post. No matter what happens, this will always stay, just we will, by each other, for each other, always.

Heres to creating more miracles together.

Happy birthday My Ironman.

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